“Type A parent” is how a lot of people identify themselves today. Becoming a parent is one of the biggest challenges this life has to offer. You never stop learning and growing. You change along the way as you go through a lot of trial and error, so your parenting style will shift time and again.
There are so many different parenting styles out there, so there is a lot to consider when deciding how you want to parent. There’s authoritarian, permissive, crunchy, and silky, to name a few.
Every style has its pros and cons. You have to decide how you want to parent based on what’s best for you and your children.
What Is A Type-A Parent
A Type-A parent is just a parent with a Type-A personality. Your personality type plays a huge role in how you parent. Some Type A personality traits include; highly organized, competitive, ambitious, and uptight.
Some examples of Type-A Parenting are; trying to stay on schedule all the time, trying to be the “best” at all things parenting, micromanaging everything they do, and having a lot of unnecessary stress.
There are definitely pros and cons to being a Type-A personality, especially when it comes to parenting. However, it is up to you to determine if the good outweighs the bad or if you want to change how you do things.
Pros of Type-A Parenting
There are pros and cons to all parenting styles, and Type-A parenting is no exception. Here are some of the good qualities and characteristics of a Type-A parent.
1. Parents Tend To Be Well Informed
Someone who is Type-A often does a lot of research on everything! This means that they typically make good choices based on the research they’ve done. While there is conflicting evidence to pretty much everything, they at least try to decipher the correct information and make their decisions based on that conclusion.
An example of this is parents who research vaccinations. Some parents dive into books and resources to learn about vaccinations and decide that they don’t want to vaccinate their kids. While other parents do research and decide that they think vaccinations are best. Both parents are likely Type-A, and they’re both doing their best to make informed decisions. Their conclusions just differ.
2. Parents Are Typically More Prepared
Someone who is a Type-A personality likes to be overly prepared for anything and everything. Feeling prepared is a very satisfying feeling, and being unprepared can be stressful. But this specific personality might overdo it a bit.
An example of this in parenting is packing for a family trip well in advance and over-packing. Another good example is using planners, charts, and other organizational tools.
3. Parents Are Always Trying Their Best
People who are Type-A are typically competitive, both with others and with themselves. Not only are they trying to do better than everyone else, but they’re also trying to do their very best. This can also apply to parenting by encouraging their kids to be their best and constantly push themselves.
An example of this in parenting is putting kids in sports or other activities and pushing them to excel. Another good example is a parent trying to be a better parent than others.
4. Parents Tend To Be More Involved
Because Type-A parents are more anxious and overly prepared, they are typically more involved in their kids’ lives. They have a desperate need to feel control, and they can’t be in control if they aren’t well informed of what’s going on in their children’s lives.
An example of this in parenting is needing to know extensive information about kids’ social lives, always wanting to volunteer at their extracurriculars, and taking part in a lot of the children’s activities.
Cons of Type-A Parenting
While there are a lot of pros to being a Type-A parent, there are also some cons to consider. Here are a few of them.
1. The Children Can Get Overwhelmed
Children become overwhelmed very easily, especially if they try to keep up with a Type-A parent. Type-A parents are all about planning ahead, overanalyzing, perfecting all aspects of their life, etc. This can be a lot for the children to take in and keep up with.
An example of this would be a child not remembering and adhering to a daily schedule, such as sleep routines, eating, school work, playtime, etc.
2. The Children Tend To Push Themselves Too Hard
Kids learn by example. You can tell them repeatedly that they are perfect the way they are, but if their parents are living their life in a Type-A kind of way, they will likely try to follow in your footsteps.
It’s hard enough trying to be perfect as an adult, but a child is so impressionable. If they constantly try to be perfect and never obtain that unrealistic goal, they always feel like a failure. And to feel like all they do is fail is quite damaging to a child’s self-confidence.
An example of this would be if a child studies really hard for a test and only gets a B, and then becomes very upset and self-critical because they don’t feel like they’ve done a good job unless they get an A.
3. Parents Are Often More Stressed and Have A Lot of Anxiety
Every parent experiences stress and anxiety from time to time, but Type-A parents are likely to have a lot more.
Extra stress comes from always planning ahead and trying to live life on a perfect schedule. Trying to be perfect is exhausting, let alone impossible.
The anxiety comes from trying to have control over everything when there’s no such thing as control. Constantly thinking they’re being judged for not being perfect and taking everything to heart that people say to or about them is bound to cause a lot of anxiety.
An example of this in parenting would be trying to always adhere to a schedule and getting very stressed when things don’t go as planned. Perhaps a baby’s sleep schedule changes, or a parent decides to do something they didn’t necessarily want to because they are afraid of judgment from others if they don’t do it.
4. The Children Can Become Rebellious
Over-controlling parents cause rebellious kids. Children have a natural tendency to rebel sometimes. But if a parent is excessively controlling or pushy, they are bound to rebel even more. No one likes feeling like they don’t have any freedom.
Another thing that will cause a child to rebel and shut down is if they feel like they are constantly failing themself or their parents. This goes back to the child following in the parent’s footsteps, trying to be perfect.
An example of this in parenting would be a parent not letting their child go to other children’s houses or have playdates because they can’t be there. The child might become rebellious and try to sneak to friends’ houses to get what they want.
5. Parents End Up Micromanaging Everything
This is a con for both the parent and the child. A constantly micromanaged child doesn’t get to grow into the person they are going to become because the parent is too busy trying to turn them into the child they want them to be.
As for the parent, micromanaging is EXHAUSTING! It makes everything harder and takes longer. Everyone should avoid micromanaging their kids for their own sanity.
An example of this in parenting is when a parent asks a child to do the dishes. The parent ends up critiquing, giving advice, and teaching the child to do it differently. The parent ends up doing most of the work anyway, and it took longer than if they would’ve just done it themselves in the first place.
A person’s personality type is always going to play a role in their parenting style. So someone with a Type A personality is likely going to be a Type A parent. It’s up to each parent to decide which parenting style will work best for their family.